One morning three women are golfing on the fourth green when suddenly
a guy runs by wearing nothing but a bag over his head.
As he passes by the first woman, she looks down and says, “Well, he’s
certainly not my husband.”
As he passes by the second woman, she also glances downward and says,
“He’s not my husband either.”
He then passes by the third woman, who also looks down as he runs by her.
“Wait a minute,” she says. “He’s not even a member of this golf club.”
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*THE WALLS OF JERICHO – SA version :)*****
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*A school inspector is visiting a grade 4 class in one of the local schools
in the Soweto township*****
*
He is introduced to the class by the teacher, Miss Wesizwe.
She says to the class: “Let’s show the inspector just how clever you are by
allowing him to ask you a question.”
The inspector decides to ask a biblical question. He asks: “Class, who
broke down the walls of Jericho?”
For a full minute there is absolute silence, the children all just stare at
him blankly.
Eventually Sipho raises his hand, the Inspector points excitedly to him
Sipho stands up and says: “Sir, I don’t know who broke down the walls of
Jericho, but it wasn’t me”
The inspector looks at the teacher for an explanation, she says: Well, I’ve
known Sipho since the beginning of the year and I believe that if he says
that he didn’t do it, then he didn’t do it.”
The inspector is shocked at the level of ignorance and storms down to the
principal’s office and tells him what happened.
The principal replies: “Look I don’t know the boy, but I socialise every
now and then with his teacher and I believe her, if she feels that the boy
was not involved, then he must be innocent.”
The inspector can’t believe what he is hearing, he grabs the phone on the
principal’s desk and dials the Minister of Education and relates the entire
episode and asks her what she thinks of the education standard in the
school.
The Minister sighs heavily and replies: “Eish wena, you know I’m very busy,
I don’t know the boy, the teacher or the principal, just get three quotes,
add 50% for me, and have the wall fixed by my brother.” *****
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For anyone who has gone through the process of resetting your
password, this is for you………….****
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*Resetting The Password*****
****
*”Sorry, your password has been in use for 30 days and has expired.You** **must
register a new one.”*****
*roses*****
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*”Sorry, too few characters.”*****
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*pretty roses*****
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*”Sorry, you must use at least one numerical character.”*****
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*1 pretty rose*****
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*”Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces.”*****
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*1prettyrose*****
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*”Sorry, you must use at least 10 different characters.”*****
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*1fuckingprettyrose*****
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*”Sorry, you must use at least one upper case character.”*****
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*1FUCKINGprettyrose*****
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*”Sorry, you cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.”**
***
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*1FuckingPrettyRose*****
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*”Sorry, you must use no fewer than 20 total characters.”*****
****
*1FuckingPrettyRoseShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon’tGiveMeAccessRightFuckingNow*****
****
*”Sorry, that password is already in use.”*
** **
******
[image: Description: cid:1.193962910@web172003.mail.ir2.yahoo.com]****
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** **
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A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden.
He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was.
Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to
her to see what had captured her attention. He noticed she was looking
at two spiders mating.
‘Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?’ she asked.
‘They’re mating,’ her father replied.
‘What do you call the spider on top?’ she asked.
‘That’s a Daddy Longlegs,’ her father answered.
‘So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?’ the little girl asked.
‘No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.’
‘The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then
lifted her foot and stomped them flat…
‘Well, we’re not having any of that moffie kak in our garden’ she says
