The ramblings of a serial head-shaver
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Does wine make you fat?
Does Wine make you Fat ?
Wine does not make you FAT – it makes you LEAN…
Against tables, chairs, floors, walls andugly people.
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Sleep-over Dog
SLEEP-OVER DOG…
An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard.
I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head;
he then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the
hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep. An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out. The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour. This continued off and on for several weeks. Curious I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.' The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar:
'He lives in a home with 6 children, 2 under the age of 3 – he's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow? -
Greek Philosophy
Keep this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumour or spread gossip.
In ancient Greece (469 – 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom.
One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about Diogenes?"
"Wait a moment," Socrates replied, "Before you tell me I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Triple Filter Test."
‘Triple filter?" asked the acquaintance."That’s right," Socrates continued, "Before you talk to me about Diogenes let’s take a moment to filter what you’re going to say. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "Actually I just heard about it."
"All right," said Socrates, "So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about Diogenes something good?"
"No, on the contrary…"
"So," Socrates continued, "You want to tell me something about Diogenes that may be bad, even though you’re not certain it’s true?"
The man shrugged, a little embarrassed. Socrates continued, "You may still pass the test though, because there is a third filter, the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about Diogenes going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "If what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me or anyone at all?"
The man was bewildered and ashamed. This is an example of why Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.It also explains why Socrates never found out that Diogenes was shagging his wife.
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Bom (golden oldie)
'n Terroris stap by 'n pet shop in.
Hy sit 'n bom op die toonbank neer en skree: "julle het 60 sekondes om hier uit te kom!!!"
'n Skilpad skree uit die agterkant van die winkel: "Jis, jy's 'n doos!"
